EC Comics Returns as an Oni Press Imprint

EC Comics was a publisher decades ago who created a variety of amazing sci-fi and horror comics among other neat stuff. Short for, "Entertaining Comics," the head--Willaim Gaines--had the company put out incredible works. In 1954 the infamous and awful book, "Seduction of the Innocent," by Wertham resulted in congressional hearings into comic books and led to the Comics Code Authority to avoid governmental censorship. Sold by Gaines in the 1960s and absorbed into various companies, the EC line found itself often reprinted and it led to the popular, "Tales From the Crypt," show which drew from one of the old comics. Now, EC Comics is coming back in a fashion as an imprint of Oni Press.

There will be new comics created through a partnership with Oni and the family of William Gaines. An impressive roster of writers and artists shall be working on the new series. Talents involved include Jason Aaron, Brian Azzarello, J.H. Williams III, Joshua Hale Fialkov, Matt Kindt, and plenty more. There appear to be plans for horror, sci-fi, and other goodness EC was known for back in the pre-code days. Thankfully, the Comics Code Authority is gone and creators can make comics about whatever they like these days (without having to be underground comix or such). I look forward to new EC comics with the first titles apparently coming in July and August!

DC's Newly Announced, "Black Label," Line Sounds Like a Bland Concept With Potentially Stellar Comics

It had been rumored for a bit, but today DC officially announced their new, "Black Label line," of comics which will basically consist of R-rated and potentially out-of-continuity stories featuring popular characters. It is a little funny as back in the day DC's now-basically-dead Vertigo line was kind of an, "R-rated Elseworlds," and the current oft-delayed books in the, "Young Animal," line can be pretty mature what-with the swearing--and let's be honest, this line sounds like an excuse to let Batman say an unedited, "Fuck," and maybe show some illustrated breasts as DC already has shared extreme violence with us in the past via their non-mature readers comics (remember when it felt like every DC book had to feature someone getting an arm ripped-off? Wild times). This whole, "Black Label," honestly sounds like a somewhat dumb idea except for the fact that the announced books actually appear like they could be really, really good.

Putting aside how annoying, "Black Label," sounds as a line name (is DC trying to riff-on alcohol brands to seem extra grown-up?) the creative teams are mostly solid, with people like Scott Snyder and Greg Capullo working on Batman and Brian Azzarello and Lee Bermejo doing a book about the Dark Knight as well,  John Ridley's earlier-disclosed book about the, "Other history," of the DC Universe being a part of this, Kelly Sue Deconnick and Greg Rucka both writing a Wonder Woman title, and, um, Frank Miller giving us, "Superman: Year One," with John Romita Jr. That last one could be good or an abomination (hey, I said the teams were, "Mostly solid," not entirely).

If these titles had simply been announced as general comics that were possibly not a part of the, "Main," DC continuity I would have still been intrigued by many of them. This whole, "Black Label," however sounds like a bland concept--"Elseworlds with boobies and cursing!"--with some potentially stellar content from the creative teams. I'm for sure curious about almost all of the announced books and want to at least give them a shot regardless of if they are a part of this new Black Label, or whatever other line DC wants to throw-out a name for.

Whether the, "Black Label," as a concept is a hit or a miss is really only of concern for me if it possibly means we will get more cool-sounding books announced. If I have to put-up with DC using this dumb new name for a line of really cool comics I'll withstand the idiocy of how it'll sound when I go into the comic shop and ask for the latest, "Black Label," as if I'm ordering a drink. Now we just need to wait for the books to come-out and hopefully be great.

News Occurred at Comic-Con International/SDCC 2016. I'll Talk About Some of it Now

Comic-Con International/SDCC occurred and some stuff happened.

Just to start, don't expect anything involving the, "Fantastic Four," in comics anytime soon, although Marvel claims to have a, "Long-term plan," for the characters. I assume that means doing nothing with them for a long term.

There were tons of movie trailers, from, "Wonder Woman," to, "Justice League," on the DC side, and, "Doctor Strange," and some teasers for the upcoming, "Thor," flick on the Marvel side. There was a, "Kong: Skull Island," preview too, but of all the samplings, it was actually a trailer  that is under two-minutes long and for a television show that really caught my interest. The video for the Marvel and Fox team-up, "Legion," looked so phenomenally weird and tonally varied it really drew my eye. One website described it as, "Eclectic," and that is an understatement. This article here on Vulture has all the clips of note.

On the subject of movies, Kurt Russel is going to be Ego the Living Planet in the 2nd, "Guardians of the Galaxy," flick. That is fascinating and I doubt anyone would have predicted that.

Someone from Bleeding Cool pissed off Brian Azzarello when a discussion occurred which pointed out the new, "Killing Joke," animated movie really makes Barbra Gordon/Batgirl look bad as a character (emotionally needy, unstable, and more). I don't think Azzarello needed to yell-out into the crowd that the person talking was a, "Pussy." That makes the whole thing a train-wreck from the movie to the panel where the insult occurred.

Brie Larson is officially Captain Marvel. I've liked her in the stuff I've seen that featured her talents, so I would say this is good news.

Besides those links it was all smaller announcements such as a Young Adult book featuring Miles Morales, "Jurassic World," comics coming out in the future, and how the X-Men are going to fight a bunch of characters yet again, but this time it is the Inhumans instead of the Avengers. Hey, after the aforementioned destruction of the, "Fantastic Four," I"m just happy the mutants still get comics too. Still, not too much to discuss from this year's convention.

DC's Publishing Plan for "The Dark Knight III: The Master Race" Sounds Really Odd

How Weird? Quite Weird!

DC had previously announced how Frank Miller would be writing a 3rd entry in his, "Dark Knight" books--yet oddly not illustrating as he did for the previous two, and even more strangely would have a co-writer in the form of Brian Azzarello.

Miller's seminal, "The Dark Knight Returns," was of course written and illustrated by him, with the much-less liked, "The Dark Knight Strikes Again," also mainly Miller besides his spouse serving colorist duties. Therefore, it's a little weird to see Miller having a co-writer, and not doing much of any art. Now, perhaps this is to keep some of Miller's more lately...eccentric tendencies in check, but it could also be Miller just only had a passing interest in doing a new Batman comic and DC told him they could lighten the creative load by tacking other folk on the title.

Whatever the case of how the creative team came about, where things get really odd is how DC is releasing the comic. You see, each issue is 32 pages and includes a 16-page mini-comic inserted into the main title. That's relatively straightforward. However, it gets odd when, as DC puts it (the all-caps are their emphasis, not mine), "After the release of each issue of DARK KNIGHT III: THE MASTER RACE, DC Entertainment will release a volume of the DARK KNIGHT III: THE MASTER RACE COLLECTOR’S EDITION that will collect the both the main story and mini-comic from latest issue of DARK KNIGHT III: THE MASTER RACE as a single 7.0625” x 10.875” title, with both stories presented at the same trim size." In other words, another version of the same comic will come out but with the mini-comic made bigger.

That's not too confusing, but then , "After the first seven DARK KNIGHT III: THE MASTER RACE COLLECTOR’S EDITION have been published, DC Entertainment will ship a special slipcase designed to hold the entire set with the eighth COLLECTOR’S EDITION." So yeah, I'm utterly lost now. Oh, and each issue (of the initial comics at least) are a hefty $5.99 and there is actually a 1:5000 variant cover, meaning a comic store would have to order five thousand copies of this comic in order to be allowed to get one measly variant with art by Jim Lee.

This is all pretty strange and an obvious blatant attempt to make a comic a collectible item before it even comes out, (and we see if it is even any good or worth collecting) eh? I mean, if the comic is actually really good I can understand people wanting special collector-sets and the like, but if this is at a level of quality like, "Holy Terror," you're better off watching two turtles mate, because it'll be just as slow and boring, but at least their humping will have an actual conclusion.

In closing, unless this gets rave reviews I'll probably pass, even though the whole mini-comic idea is kind of fun before the weird, "Collector's edition," stuff comes into play. I imagine DC would like you to buy this though, as they have a lot riding on its success after apparently facing some big austerity measures, despite protests to the contrary.

Links to Peruse For Fun and Learning

Link-Intro
As I'm always finding interesting links on the internet I of course occasionally like to share the ones I think are especially worth reading with you, my dear readers. So dig in to this feast for your eyes!

The Links You Should Look At

The cover is the first warning sign.

The 35-issue run on "Wonder Woman" by Azzarello and Chiang has been considered by many to be one of the best takes on the character in some time. That makes it all the more depressing that the new creative team of writer Meredith Finch and artist David Finch (they're a married couple, in case you wondered about the same last name) is apparently God-awful and entirely misses the point of what makes Wonder Woman great in favor of making her a generic whiner. Yeah, DC done messed up and has ruined any goodwill for Wonder Woman they may have had.

For some time Bill Cosby has had some extremely depressing details about his personal behavior whispered about, but it also seemed that he had somehow been able to quiet the dull roar about how he quite possibly was a serial rapist, basically getting away with it. Well, lately that dull roar has become too loud to ignore, and now he may finally have to actually own-up to the claims or at least have the courtesy to deny them as opposed to just shaking his head and refusing to talk about it. All of this also raises the question though, what does it mean when someone who was a childhood hero to so many may very well be a monster?

In my last link-post I talked about how the launch of "Assassin's Creed: Unity" has been a comedy of errors (it's so bad people have made pieces of art based on the especially bad glitches). That makes it all the more surprising that the entirely different game in the AC-Universe that launched on the same day but only for last-generation consoles, "Assassin's Creed: Rogue", is in fact apparently pretty good according to some people and awesome in other's eyes. Apparently it serves as a nice link between the 3rd and 4th game while also doing some unique things such as making breaking through ice-breakers a fun little hobby. On a side-note about the Assassin's Creed-series, this piece on the representation of race in the AC-games is really good and worth a read.

Sometimes when applying for a job we've been asked to make a PowerPoint presentation, example of a press release document, or something like that. This article makes applying for certain jobs sound absolutely nightmarish, however, with examples such as basically being asked to make an issue of a magazine in 72 hours with 30+ examples of articles or other extensive projects for a job that may not even hire someone for all this work--even possibly using it without paying them or giving any credit.

McConnell has mastered the art of looking cranky.

It's funny to hear Republicans complain about how Obama taking Executive Action with Immigration Reform will immediately damage any potential relationship he would have with the newly-fully-Republican-controlled Congress. It is funny because it is not as if there would be a snowball's chance in Hell of Republicans ever doing the slightest thing for Obama considering how the previous six years went between everyone. It makes it kind of a "Oh, now you claim to want to foster a bond," moment where you basically roll your eyes as hard as possible at the GOP. As this article says, it is probably going to bring both sides plenty of pain--we will just have to see if it's hopefully worth it in the end.

I still don't really understand Uber. I suppose it is like taking a taxi but instead you're getting in the car of someone who isn't necessarily officially licensed to be a form of commercial transportation? Whatever the case, some people love it but the executives at the company seem to have a propensity for making stupid comments, with one man's remarks at a dinner he thought was off-the-record being especially disconcerting, even if it was supposedly meant more as a joke than anything else.

Finally, for all of you who think your washing-machine might smell a bit funny, there is a good chance it could actually have a problem. Apparently front-loaders in particular can build-up mildew or other nastiness (although top-loading washers aren't exempt from this either) and doing certain things to keep your washer clean can assist in avoiding any nastiness.

I'm Still Not Buying "Before Watchmen"

I'm still not buying "Before Watchmen," but from what I've seen through flipping through the books at my comic-shop...yuck.

The Rorschach comic by Azzarello and Bermejo is pretty but mainly be a hokey revenge-fantasy where you cheer for our, "hero," instead of a tragic tale about the horribly broken man he actually is, "Nite Owl," has pretty art thanks to the Kuberts but the writing is god-awful (Straczynski, what happened to you?), and "Ozymandis," has some of the most amazing art ever thanks to Jae Lee paired with a story that reads as if it were terrible fan-fiction--"My girlfriend is dead, I'll become the greatest super-hero ever and avenge her like a cliche instead of being the intriguing character I was in Alan Moore's story!" Oh,  and the Dr. Manhattan comic (also by Straczynski) seems to completely miss the point of the character and pretty much be telling a, "What if this happened instead in Watchmen's history?" story. It also gets Schrodinger's physics theories terribly wrong, as is pointed out in this article which reviews some other, much better, comics along with the travesty that is, "Dr. Manhattan."

As for all the other comics, "The Comedian," is just sort of...there, I haven't given Silk Spectre a once-over, and Minutemen seems to be the least offensive to my tastes of the current crop of books. Did I overlook any of the other books that have come out yet? I may have, but they are just so forgettable.

Oh yeah, in awhile we also get two issues focused on bit-character Moloch because...well, I don't know why. It's written by the man producing the worst,  "Before Watchmen," comics (Straczynski strikes again!) and illustrated by the talented Risso. Why are good artists doing this travesty?

I was against, "Before Watchmen," on ethical grounds, and now I can't even say it is succeeding as story-telling as the tales are basically just diluting, "Watchmen," through either trying to over-explain things that didn't need to be discussed, altering the original story in harmful ways, or just basically being mediocre. It's just sad, frankly, and pretty much what I expected this series to be. It will never be cannon for me when it comes to Watchmen. Just some random stories with characters from the main series, really, nothing more.

The worst part is...these comics are apparently selling quite well. So much for ethics.

Rant-Reviews--Everything is Terrible, Even the Good Stuff Part 2---DC Destruction

There are some DC books out there to examine and insult/praise. Oh, and I'm going to discuss a Vertigo book which isn't really DC per-se but their alternative more mature line. It's still the same company though so who gives a rotten apple?

Justice League #7
So we're doing that old comic, "The Authority," about heroes who are kind of bad guys but don't realize it? Nah, not really. We're doing a comic about a world that doesn't trust their heroes? Well, the people seem to love them even if some government suits complain. We're doing a comic about the, "Birth of a Villain," as the title claims? Yeah right, we don't get a hint of that till about the last couple of pages.

What is this then? Basically a comic about a dude named Steve Trevor and what his life is like interacting with the Justice League via Skype or something. Oh, and there is some action with a weird spore-monster. This is really just kind of disjointed and a bit odd though. Still, I'll take that over the pretty-but-pointless mess that was the first six issues of this series. It's like this went from a hot girl you couldn't stand listening to into a somewhat attractive person who is all over the place emotionally but interesting enough that you'll tough it out through her psychotic breaks in which she tries to cut you. Yeah, this comic is a dysfunctional relationship. Take it to Thanksgiving dinner and show it to mom and dad. They won't approve, they never do of the hussies you bring back over the holidays.
3 out of 5 stars.

Batman #7
This isn't amazing like issue #5 which was utterly trippy and much better than any mainstream super-hero comic has the right to be, and it isn't kind of cool like #6 with its surreal bits too. No, this is just one of those, "Everything you think you know about Batman's history is wrong!," comics...which is kind of funny because I thought due to the big DC continuity reboot we're not supposed to know anything about Batman's history for sure anyway. You can't really shock me by going "Boo!" when your company already did the equivalent of kidnapping me, tying me up, putting me a potato bag, and dumping me in a river gasping for air.

 That metaphor is how trying to figure out DC's new continuity feels. It's murky, scratchy, and cold. That's why you can't catch me off guard with all this stuff about a secret group themed off of owls running Gotham--I didn't even know we were supposed to think of it as a place run by Batman anymore. Oh, and Batman punches one of his former sidekicks/adopted sons in the mouth to reveal a special tooth implanted there long ago by the villains. Couldn't he have just told the guy about it and taken it out with some Novocaine instead of walloping the dude? Batman, the adoptive father who punches you to prove a point.
2.5 out of 5 stars.

Grifter #7
In this comic a hero named Midnighter acts like a total idiot when he could try just talking to Grifter or taking him back to the Stormwatch base instead of trying to kill him, Grifter touches a weird alien artifact and learns stuff, and the two fight in a poorly illustrated comic. This is what I read, and then I cried many, many bitter tears over the fact that I actually bought this comic and thought at the start it seemed remotely interesting. Will it improve somehow? Well, let's see who the next writer for it is and....Rob Liefeld? Oh FUCK, I've got to drop this from my pull-list ASAP!
1 out of 5 stars.

Spaceman #5
The thing about Brian Azzarello and Eduardo Risso is that they have worked closely together for so long they could be one person, and this one person makes damn good comics. When you hear about a comic focused on a genetically-altered "man" that riffs on how people use funny internet slang, reality television, global warming, and throws in some space-stuff you hear about something which sounds like an utter mess. This duo/essentially-one-person however can have so damn much skill this comic comes out hotter than a biscuit you left in the oven and burnt so badly your spouse yells at you and threatens to leave forever, but then again doesn't he/she always pull that shit when you forget their birthday? I'm getting distracted though, this comic is great stuff, should be read by all, and treasured for being unique in this landscape where you're considered clever for writing something where Cyclops and Captain America punch each other.
4.5 out of 5 stars

DCU Online Legends #26
The last issue of a series that became terrible and utterly incomprehensible around the half-way point. I have no idea why I kept reading this even though it made zero sense with its jumping around in time. Maybe it is kind of the same way people like staring at really brutal car crashes where entrails and blood are all over the place--its just so hideous and gruesome you can't look away. Whatever the case, we get a comic where Lex Luthor learns that maybe Superman isn't so bad before he resets the Universe and the entire comic becomes even more of a pointless endeavor than it was. This happy-go-lucky and nice Luthor is annoying as hell, the comic is ugly as sin (as it has been over the whole series) and if you ever want to start a war between two nations have one give the other a collection of all 26 issues of this and force them to read it. Bombs will be flying before the day is through.
.5 out of 5 stars.

T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents #5
Oh Nick Spencer, you can write as many shitty Marvel comics as you want, because somehow with that exclusivity contract for them you still got to write this series, and it is so good I just can't care that you seem to either write amazing stuff or absolute trash. Your first volume of this series is one of my favorite recent comic collections and this new batch from the re-launched DC Universe that thankfully didn't touch your run is so good too. I just lie in bed at night and rub this comic all over my body, which gets my girlfriend weirded-out, but I don't care because she doesn't understand the love I have for this series. Oh, and this issue, it brings some dangling plot threads home and introduces those trademark last-minutes twists I've so grown to love.

 I know you cry when people mock your other comics on the internet, Nick, but its okay, I still like you. At least as long as you are writing this series, then you either need to up your game on something else or you'll be known as, "That guy who did good stuff awhile ago but now sucks," just like so many other creators (Jeph Loeb, Mark Millar, that guy who draws a huge-breasted witch named Tarot...um, Jim Balent, that's it!).
4.5 out of 5 stars.

Captain Atom #7
I'm just still amazed that J.T. Krul can write a comic that is actually good, and which I'll miss when its cancelled because this thing sells worse than Barbra Walters recent sex tape. Yes, Barbra Walters has a sex tape. I bought the only copy by accident and it's nightmarish.
3.5 out of 5 stars.

Someday I'll have nothing snarky to say about the comics I've read. That is the day I am murdered by Mark Millar and he makes it look like J.T. Krul did it because Millar has enough money to buy a small country thanks to all those movie options of his shitty comics.

Thoughts and Links AKA Before Watchmen? No, Just No

Before Watchmen: The Event No One Wanted At A Time It's Not Needed

We have this event, called, "Before Watchmen" that is happening. It's a prequel bunch of comics to Watchmen. When I first heard about this I thought the announcement was about a series of one-shots so I thought, "this is probably a shameless cash-grab, but a little companion trade-paperback to Watchmen could maybe, just maybe, be interesting." Then I read this link and learned how we are getting a ton of issues. 30+ books? Really? Do I need to remind anyone the original Watchmen was 12 issues? Alan Moore may be a bit cranky sometimes but is of course correct in pointing out how its sad that DC is mining his ideas from 25 years ago for new material. Then, as David Brothers discusses, someone has the nerve to argue out that Alan Moore being pissed is somehow a good thing? I don't know why David Brothers even reads Newsarama.

I think it is the nerve of DC to do this that boggles my mind. They just did a huge re-launch they should be focusing all their creators and money on, and instead they decided to try and exploit this old property with the idea that maybe they can maybe make some cash or another movie from it (note: just a theory about a movie). Watchmen worked best as a tale about a bunch of washed-up heroes who were an ensemble, and now we're going to expand something without the creators guys who made it so special being involved one iota. What. The. Fuuuucccckkkk?

You may be asking, "David, I get it, you're annoyed and a bit pissed, but are you going to check out any of the books?" No, not really. The only one that seems the slightest bit promising is the idea of Brian Azzarello writing Rorschach as he does a good job with gritty, crime-stuff. Then again, couldn't Mr. Azzarello just make his own amazing crime caper without trying to mess with Watchmen? 100 Bullets was pretty good, why not make another thing like that instead of grabbing Alan Moore's baby and shaking it until all the money in its diaper has fallen to the floor? I know I'm mixing my metaphors horribly, but the point is Watchmen worked best a 12 issue series and now DC wants to do this...yuck. Also, who wants to take bets that somehow Straczynski ends up not being able to finish his Dr. Manhattan book for some reason and they need someone else to take over?

Link-mania

In less annoying and more heartwarming news, but which still oddly involves a comic company jumping around in a series' time-line, Archie is going to have a baby with Valerie of Josie and the Pussycats in his comic set in alternate futures. Some people are making a fuss as the baby will be multi-racial. He has a future with Veronica, Betty, Valerie, they had a comic with gay character Kevin Keller getting married...it boggles my mind Archie comics got so progressive. They are selling though, so I guess it all works out.

In sad news, the creator of Soul Train, Don Cornelius, died. Soul Train was an awesome show and beat the lame American Bandstand in awesomeness hands-down.

Donald Trump endorsing Mitt Romney...hmmmm. Is an endorsement form Trump really something you want?

Apparently some people  don't believe a groundhog has the power to predict how the season will work out. You are all non-believers; of course a small mammal that burrows underground controls the climate!

An airline added a $2.00 fee for, "Unintended consequences." You know, I hated flying before security got even more crazy, tickets went through the roof, and shit just generally went right into the fan in regards to airline industries. Imagine how I feel about going to the airport now.

I hated how Iron Man 2.0 ended. Well, maybe there was a lot more going on behind the scenes than I realized to make it so terrible, as one of the artists, Ariel Olivetti revealed in an interview.

I will never be as clever as Tucker Stone, or his friends he gets to help review things like movies.

That's the end of that.

Some interesting links, pointless events, there we go.

Horror Movies, Battlefield 3, And The Quirkiest Comic I've Read

Let Us Begin
It's been a bit since I posted, so sorry if you've been patiently waiting. I hope to actually get a few posts up sooner than later however, so if that works out everyone should be happy.

Anyways, today I'm going to talk about some horror movies I watched and re-watched for Halloween (I always watch scary flicks on that holiday) and how one was bad and one continues to be pretty good. After that I'm going to discuss a game I've been enjoying playing called Battlefield 3 (I've been playing the console version, PS3 to be exact). Lastly, I'm going to discuss one of the quirkier comics lately that I've read, Spaceman #1 by the superstar team of Brian Azzarello and Eduardo Risso.

Horror and just Horrible
I watched two horror films for Halloween. I viewed for the first time the ninth movie in the Friday The 13th series which is inexplicably named, "Jason Goes to Hell," and, "A New Nightmare." I'd seen the latter a few times and like it quite a bit for reasons that will be discussed, but, "Jason Goes To Hell," was just an utter mess/train-wreck/abomination of a movie.

The movie starts in a way that is actually kind of promising. The idea is that people have wised up to the fact that maybe it would make sense to quit letting this guy with a huge machete keep killing kids and instead just obliterate him. This leads to an opening where Jason is tricked into being utterly shot up by an FBI task force and then blown into pieces. It's pretty cool actually. Sadly, it all goes horribly downhill from there.

You see, apparently Jason can possess people now and after his heart hypnotizes someone into eating it (you read that right) the new Jason sets off to....well, here's where things get quite strange. You see, Jason apparently had a sister we NEVER, EVER heard of in all the other movies, and this one bounty hunter guy knows all this and how to kill Jason for reasons that are NEVER EVER explained because, hey, movies!

For some reason this guy knows everything to advance the plot of the movie. Why? Who knows?

So Jason has to possess this sibling, her daughter, or the daughter's baby. Because the blood of a relative can something-something. The plot makes zero sense, and almost none of the characters are people worth caring about. The movie also tries to be funny at the worst times when this series has not been one for humor...ugh.

How's the violence and gore though for people who like that? Well, there is some violence and such so you get slashing and whatnot. Plus, there is the required T&A with barely-legal teens having sex before Jason of course butchers them (teens never should have sex in horror movies, ever). There isn't anything that clever in terms of how Jason kills people though, like in one of the Friday's where he makes an RV crash. Now that was boss.

Jason--Doesn't Approve of Premarital Sex.

This was a disappointing movie and I wouldn't recommend watching it at all. Now, A New Nightmare is a whole 'nother story. Why? Well, it's sort of the 7th movie but different too as it takes place in the, "real world," as it were. You see, in this movie Wes Craven appears as himself and The Nightmare on Elm Street movies are just that, movies. The man who played Freddy, Robert Englund, is around too just being a nice guy like he is in actual life. The thing is, they are making a new Nightmare on Elm Street movie and weird things have been happening.

Long story short, Freddy is trying to get into the real world and Heather (who played Nancy in the original movie) is pretty much screwed. Then, cool meta-fiction shenanigans ensue and despite a slightly weak ending a good movie is had even with acting that is a bit over-the-top as is standard in horror flicks. This is a bit more mature and grown-up than other horror films though, having talk of concepts of stories that can think instead of showing lots of boobies. It's a good film.
Jason Goes To Hell: 1 out of 5 stars.
A New Nightmare: 4 out of 5 stars.


Good Fun, Just Ditch The Single-Player Mode--Battlefield 3

Gather round young un's and hear the tale of the Battlefield games. They started out on the PC and were good fun. You played in huge areas against a lot of people shooting and running, flying and driving, it was quite a gas. Well, then to compete with the "Modern Warfare" games that everyone loved they made a version of Battlefield that tacked on a single-player mode.

Boy, was that single-player mode God-awful. I mean, I barely made it through much of it even if the story everyone else made fun of looked a little neat to me. The way the enemies just seemed to always know where you were and shoot expertly was unbelievably annoying, and it was no fun at all. Don't worry though, my little ones, there was still multiplayer, and it was a hoot--even with a caveat.

You see, they put the Battlefield 3 on consoles too, and even though PCs with their fancy equipment could run the best graphics and have up to 64 or such players on a map, the consoles could only have 24--I believe. It was okay though, as the developers were smart and adjusted things for this. Now, before it sounds like this era of Battlefield 3 was all peachy-keen, I have to tell you children of something sad. Something dark and evil, a play-pass.

You see, with a Playstation 3 the idea is you can play online for free, but EA in their infinite wisdom didn't want people who bought Battlefield 3 used or rented it to get to play the multiplayer without coughing up some money, so they created an online pass for 9-ish dollars. Yes, it was a twisted, evil thing that stood in the way of getting to the sweet, sweet multiplayer for those of us who didn't want to spend 60 bucks on the game and just wanted to rent it, but life's a bitch and then you die. Don't tell your mother I swore.

Anyways, as you all can see Battlefield 3 was a genuinely fun time to be had, and the time it was out before the new Modern Warfare was an interesting number of weeks. Perhaps sometime I'll tell you kids about what it was like when Modern Warfare came out and the games ended up facing off in the marketplace--as it were. Sometime, but not tonight, get to bed.
4 out of 5 stars.

A Grounded Astronaut--Spaceman #1

From the team that brought you 100 bullets we get a new nine-issue mini-series with a debut issue that just costs one dollar. It's easily worth a dollar, heck, it'll be worth the 3 when its a full series I'd say. Why? Because this is just one interestingly quirky comic. It's not really funny or silly, but its not quite dark and depressing. It's about an interesting future with a man who was made in lab to go to mars and now collects salvage. His name is Orson and he's a nice fellow.

There's also some other interesting plot stuff going on that should make for a cool story and Risso turns in killer art as always while Azzarello does a good job writing with a unique future-slang that seems to be something like today's web-gibberish if people spoke it aloud. It's all really good stuff and I'll be back for a second helping, no doubt.
4.5 out of 5 stars.

Shut It Down
To end this post, Horror movies can be awful in a good way or just awful, but they can also be pretty good in general too. Battlefield 3 has some multiplayer fun awaiting those who buy it or are willing to cough up the extra scratch, but avoid the single-player for it unless you just want to more disappointed than a Republican trying to find a Presidential candidate they like who is also actually electable (zing!). Lastly, buy and read Spaceman #1 because it's just a dollar and quite delightful.

Rant-Reviews--An Avalanche of Comics Part 1

It's been a week since I updated, oh dear. Well, to make it up to you I have a pile of comics from recently and not-so-recently in time I will share my thoughts on...with a vengeance. Expect another avalanche possibly tomorrow or Friday.

Avengers: The Children's Crusade #7
Wait, this series is still going, and we're only just entering the final stretch? Jeez. At least it looks good and has some cool fighting. That's about it, it looks good and fights well, kind of like a woman who's been taught self-defense classes and uses it on you when you get a little too close at the bar and whisper something a little crass in her ear.
3 out of 5 stars.

Nightwing #1
This aknowledges Dick Grayson was Batman for a year, so that's nice. It also has him talking about how he enjoyed being in the circus and fighting some guy who has claws like Wolverine. Not the best thing ever, but I"ll try issue number two and see if I like it.
2.5 out of 5 stars.

Mister Terrific #1
The internet seems all split on whether it likes this or not. Well, I liked it and found it pretty fun and entertaining. Our protagonist has the just right amount of snark, and yeah, the comic does mention race twice in a kind of unnecessary fashion which makes things awkward, but that's the only thing dragging my score down.
3.5 out of 5 stars.

DC Universe Presents: Deadman #1
Wow....I mean, wow. This was actually really damn good. It looked nice, the plot was engaging, and I otherwise was just quite impressed. Paul Jenkins really did a good job writing this--which is interesting as he is apparently helping with the awful Dark Knight comic too (I skimmed it, hoo boy). Seriously, pick this up for however many issues the story is about Deadman.
4.5 out of 5 stars.

Uncanny X-Force #15
This was utterly trippy, with the whole super-evolution thing, the great art by Jerome Opena, and some wicked-dark humor. Just awesome.
4.5 out of 5 stars.

Wonder Woman #1
I was so confused for much of this comic, until things finally became a little clearer at the end of the issue. Still, I didn't love this as much as it seems some people did. I mean, it was above-average, but I wasn't utterly wowed.
3 out of 5 stars.

Alpha Flight #4
Now an ongoing series (yah) this issue still marginally ties in with "Fear Itself" but not really, and thank God because it would probably make this a lot less fun that it actually is. Good times all around.
4 out of 5 stars.

Ultimate Comics X-Men #1
Another part of the DC new number ones....er, wait. Sorry, let me start again. Part of the new Ultimate comics coming out from Marvel, this is the start of Nick Spencer's run on the series and it's...interesting. I see the formation of what could definitely turn out to be fun stuff, but right now I'm just sort of interested to see where things go. Yes, intriguing is the best word, but not quite fun.
3.5 out of 5 stars.

More tomorrow or Friday.

Rant Reviews--Failing At Seducing You By Cape Comics

Girl, I'm going to seduce you. I'll kick things off with a review of the good Flashpoint #4 before discussing the even better Flashpoint: Batman, Knight of Vengeance #3. Then I'll get your engine really humming with my thoughts on Marvel Universe VS Wolverine #2. Then we're gonna drink a bit, with my man Tony Stark. That's right, we've got a drunk Iron Man in Invincible Iron Man #506. What else have I got planned? Well I know you like a little bit of pain, so I brought Batman: The Dark Knight #4, which is so bad it hurts, but I know you like that, girl. Don't worry though, I'll make you feel real good with Detective Comics #880, the penultimate issue of the series before the big upcoming relaunch, yeah, its the issue right before the climax. Let's get started, girl, because I know the anticipation is driving you crazy.

Crazy-Dark--Flashpoint: Batman, Knight of Vengeance #2

Flashpoint: Batman, Knight of Vengeance #2
This issue takes the story into overdrive and takes full advantage of this alternate-universe setting in ways that allow Brian Azzarello to write some incredibly dark comics, and Eduardo Risso to provide some beautiful illustrations. The clever way Azzarello twists the Batman mythos around is mystifying. Spoilers abound after the cut.

New Thoughts On The DC 52 In September--Will Try The First Issue

There are the DC books that you may not be sure are worth getting an arc of, but you're willing to try the first issue. These are the ones I'll give a shot for various reasons.

A Long Post About Two Great Anthology Comics--Dark Horse Presents #1 AND Strange Adventures #1

Dark Horse Presents #1 AND Strange Adventures #1
Two different anthology comics from two different publishers. Both are $7.99, and both have some really great tales and some so-so ones (which is how anthologies usually are). I'm intrigued these companies are doing this as apparently anthologies aren't the biggest sellers, but I'm also pleased as both of these comics definetely had some stories that were keepers. I am now going to go heavily in-depth about each book, jumping between them at will and otherwise confusing the hell out of you, my dear reader. Oh, I'm also going to be a wise-ass for the stories I don't like, so you might laugh too.

Flashpoint: Batman, Knight Of Vengeance AKA The Only Tie-In Of The Countless I'm Getting

Flashpoint: Batman, Knight of Vengeance #1
This is the only Flashpoint tie-in of the numerous ones I am getting, and I am happy I made the exception of getting it because this is some really good stuff!

A Wonder Woman Book I Would Read--It Would Be Pretty Crazy

DC has released some information about their creative teams for a few the upcoming new comics they are launching in September. I found some of them interesting, but the one that most caught my eye was Brian Azzarello writing Wonder Woman. I normally think of Azzarello as more of a crime or Noir writer, so I'd be interested to see his take on Wonder Woman. Hopefully it will go over better than Superman.

What I would love, and which would not ever happen, is he takes some of his old concepts. Like, Wonder Woman stumbles across a suitcase with a gun and 100 untraceable bullets and a list of people who have wronged the Amazons and the comic then becomes about her hunting them down. Or, he could do something out of left-field like make Wonder Woman a private detective in one of the big DC cities and in her spare time she solves mysteries and uses the lasso of truth when shes trying to follow a lead in her cases to make sure informants tell the truth. She could have a special costume for her detective-type work that looks like a weird mixture of old private-dick trench-coat and modern special-ops suit. Oh, and even though he's from Marvel comics throw in the Kingpin, Wilson Fisk, because he's always involved in crime-type stuff. I'd read it.

Flashback Friday--Joker

Joker
An original graphic novel that was released by DC comics as a snazzy-looking hardcover, this out-of-continuity tale focuses on a much more real-world version of Gotham where the Joker one day gets released from Arkham Asylum and tries to rebuild his criminal empire--all viewed through the eyes of a young Johnny Frost. It's written by the talented Brian Azzarello who knows a thing or two about crime-comics, and has beautiful artwork by Lee Bermejo--who does all the pencils but unfortunately doesn't ink every page. Oh, it is also relentlessly dark in tone and about as close as you can get to a Vertigo comic with DC super heroes. I really like it.

Whatever Happened To Batman: Europa?

Remember back in November 2010 when DC Comics had a new Batman mini-series on the cover of Previews magazine called "Batman: Europa"? Well not even the first issue has come out and despite others asking about it awhile ago when it missed the first ship date, it now seems to have fallen completely off the radar. This is disappointing because it sounded neat. It had Jim Lee doing painted art in an issue, Jock doing art for another, and Brian Azzarello writing a tale about Batman having to team up with the Joker to find the cure for a virus that has infected the ol' Batman.

I honestly haven't heard a peep about this series since March-ish and can only figure that work is progressing on it very slowly with DC planning to re-solicit it when they actually have enough of a complete product that they can release the darn thing.I mean, it is in-continuity--I'm pretty sure--but it isn't too important to the current comics story-wise so they can pretty much just release it whenever they finally get this thing done.

Flashback Friday--Absolute Superman For Tomorrow

Absolute Superman For Tomorrow (Collecting Issues #204-#215)
This is one good-looking mess of a story. Seriously, as I discussed in my podcast post (why not listen to it and subscribe via iTunes?) this is confusing as hell despite having great art. Let's look at just where things go wrong after the break--and yes, I try to be funny again like in some of my posts.

Podcast Episode 4--Old Comics and New News.

In this episode I discuss my disappointment with the Marvel series 5 Ronin, discuss stupid politicians or wannabe politicians like Donald Trump, and get confused by the Absolute Edition of Superman: For Tomorrow.

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