Marvel Has the X-Men Event, "DNX," Coming This Fall, and Maybe Too Many Events Occurring, Honestly

Comic-book companies (particularly Marvel and DC) love a big event every now and then. Some take up a bunch of the comic line, and others are a bit more focused. The X-Men have a new horror-styled event called, "DNX," just announced for this Fall. Featuring the tagline, "Evolution is contagious," it makes me wonder if Marvel is aiming for some kind of boost in the number of mutants as was happening pre, "House of M," before the number of mutants was drastically reduced and slowly started growing again to a level where they again work as, "hated and feared minority," without being outright, "Endangered," as they were for a bit.

At the moment, Marvel has a number of smaller events all planned or popping off at once for better and worse. As Bleedingcool discussed, "So that's DNX for the X-Men, Armageddon for Avengers, Death Spiral for Spider-Man and Venom, and Queen In Black for Venom and Thor… any more for any more?" They're being snarky, but have a point about, "Eventitis," as it is sometimes called. Marvel seems to be stuck either doing a single massive event or a bunch of small ones at a near-constant rate. DC, meanwhile, has been steadily gaining more of the comic market through a slow-and-steady growth of their massively popular, "Absolute," line and an event here and there, such as the recently concluded and generally inoffensively fun, "DC K.O." I'm not the head of either company so I am wholly unqualified to argue who is doing, "Better." I would say a lot more people are excited for DC comics these days than a lot of Marvel's output, however.

The last big X-Men event I gave much attention to was, "House of X/Powers of X," which led into an era of the X-Men and many mutants spending a lot of time living on the island of Krakoa before that all wound down with little of consequence to show for an epic start and whimper of a conclusion. That said, a lot of these events are about the journey, not the destination ("Flashpoint," was a ton of fun years ago and led into the ho-hum New 52). Will the, "Adventure," we have with DNX or any other Marvel event strike enough of a nerve that people will really dig them? We shall see, and in the end, the comics at Marvel almost seem like an afterthought with how much is undoubtedly riding on the Marvel Cinematic Universe and if, "Avengers Doomsday," and, "Secret Wars," will undo the general feeling of disinterest many folks have had towards the MCU since, "Endgame." It is going to be a pivotal 2026 for Marvel, that's for sure.

"Peacemaker," Season Two Looks as Wild as the First

I quite enjoyed that James Gunn, "The Suicide Squad," movie and loved the, "Peacemaker," show he did even more. A lot has happened with the DC Cinematic Universe, but even if continuity is in a bit of a flux since that, "Flashpoint," movie nobody saw, the first season of, "Peacemaker," and that Suicide Squad flick did happen in some fashion even if the latest season makes it clear we're in the new continuity thanks to some fun guest stars early in the latest teaser trailer that just dropped today. Check it out below:

Well, this looks utterly zany in the same fashion as the first season, and I eagerly welcome Tim Meadows popping up along with plenty of other new talents and great folks from the debut season. It appears there is a hint of multiversal shenanigans too (perhaps to explain the universe and what, "Counts," or not). I look forward to the season's debut on August 21st!

These New Batman, "Super Powers," Toys Are a Nice Mix of Retro and Modern

McFarlane Toys has announced new retro-inspired toys are coming to the, "Super Powers," line. The original line came about in the 1980s. It's been brought back at various points when a nostalgic twist is needed with newer toys. Some new Batman-focused ones have been announced featuring the Flashpoint-event Thomas Wayne Batman, a standard Bruce Wayne Batman, and (now that's a throwback) the Whirlybat an old-school helicopter. These look pretty cool and I'd snatch up the Flashpoint Batman one if I see it in a store! Keep your eyes peeled for these this October, or preorder them online from McFarlane Toys' itself.

"Superman: Legacy," Has Casting News, and the Internet Has Opinions

James Gunn and Peter Safran are going to reboot the DC film Universe. This seems sorely needed considering how many DC projects he had minimal or no involvement in struggled lately. Everyone is pointing fingers after, "Flashpoint," cratered in theaters despite looking fun, with Gunn escaping most blame due to it being a mess for years before DC brought him and Safran in to refresh the entire DC line of flicks and shows. One of the first things Gunn has coming down the pipeline is, "Superman: Legacy." Hence, all eyes have been on the project with fans of Gunn as well as his detractors (some folks really preferred Zack Snyder's stuff) eager for any drips of information. Well, two big ol' droplets of news have metaphorically splashed across the internet and said internet has many opinions. Yes, Clark Kent/Superman and Lois Lane have been cast for the flick.

For, "Superman: Legacy," our titular Super-fella will be David Corenswet and Lois Lane shall be portrayed by Rachel Brosnahan. I will say I enjoyed Brosnahan in, "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel," which just finished its run on Amazon Prime so I'm sure she'll be great. I have to admit I am unfamiliar with Corenswet but from what I've seen looking at his bibliography of work he seems talented. Apparently some on the internet have been making comments regarding how he looks a little like Henry Cavill and therefore is somehow a downgrade or such. A small chunk of the internet sometimes really seems to have a lot of love for Cavill in the role and is providing minimal backlash that some are overstating, but I was never huge on him or opposed to his work in the role, so I'm happy to give Corenswet's take a chance. The flick isn't even due until 2025 at the earliest so I'm sure much more will be revealed about, "Superman: Legacy," and other DC projects the next handful of months.

"Flashpoint: Beyond," Has Been a Fun Series

The fifth of sixth (honestly sixth of seventh) and therefore the penultimate issue of, "Flashpoint: Beyond," is out in some stores today and the rest tomorrow (DC comics come out on Tuesday is stores choose to put them out then). It interestingly enough seems to spoil, "Dark Crisis on Infinite Earths," before it even finishes, but that's okay as we basically knew the Justice League who seemed dead would be back. I was a big fan of, "Flashpoint," itself even if the New52 it created was hit-or-miss. Therefore, the return of the Flashpoint universe for this event has been pretty fun. 

We've witnessed as Thomas Wayne (who is aware this World shouldn't exist) has struggled to solve a number of mysteries and at the same time, Bruce Wayne has clearly been involved and upsetting those who control time travel. Geoff Johns, Jeremy Adams, and Tim Sheridan have all collaborated on the series with Eduardo Risso doing the #0 issue's art and Mikel Janin and Xermanico doing the rest of the series. There has been ample discussion of the, "Rules," of the DC Universe with its realities and time-space continuum, a clock-themed serial killer, and plenty of alternate-universe shenanigans. I look forward to the finale when it arrives in some weeks. I'm suspicious (in a good way) that this may lead to a whole different series involving Thomas Wayne and/or the Flashpoint Universe, but we shall see.

5 out of 5 stars (for issues #0-#5).

DC Comics Announces, "Dark Crisis," is Coming

DC has announced a new event known as, "Dark Crisis." It will begin with a Free Comic Book Day #0 issue, then a Justice League comic comes out in late May titled, "Justice League: Road to Dark Crisis," which takes place after the regular series has #75, which apparently kills a bunch of them. At that point, "Dark Crissi," begins properly with #1 in June. It is a tad confusing, kind of like how, "Secret Empire," has a first issue that wasn't really a first issue (this will hopefully be better than that event, however). Joshua Williamson will be writing, "Dark Crisis," and Daniel Sampere is doing the art on at least the zero issue. As for what the event is about, it is the usual, "Multiverses will die!" type stuff. We get a, "New generation of heroes," and it all sounds suitably epic as events generally tend to be.

DC has had a number of events--many with, "Crisis," in the title. Some have been great, some have been awful. Bleeding Cool has noted all the interesting little pieces that might be involved in, "Dark Crisis," and I now know better than to predict if an event will be good or bad ("Fear Itself," sucking and, "Flashpoint," being a treat illustrated that). All I can say is, "Dark Crisis," sounds like an interesting tale with its question of what happens when the Justice League is gone but a new crisis arises. Plus, at least it isn't being advertised as yet another reboot of the Universe! I'll check out the FCBD issue at least because--obviously--it is free!

The More, "Heroes Reborn," Comics Marvel Announces, The Less Excited I Am

 

Last month Marvel announced a mini-event titled, "Heroes Reborn." It imagines a world where the Avengers never formed along with other heroes starting-up and instead the Squadron Supreme is running the show along with other interesting new versions of familiar characters. I thought it was basically an arc of, "Avengers," or a standalone mini-series. I was wrong as Marvel keeps announcing various one-shots and tie-ins As this, "Mini," event becomes more of a big full-fledged, "Event," I just find myself losing interest in buying any of it. 

Massive events sometimes are cool but can be a waste of money too. I've been following a number of comics that tie-in with, "King in Black," because I have soft spot for Venom/symbiote stories and it's been alright, but I'm glad I am being a little picky in which books I spent money on with that mega-event. I do like a good alternate-Universe tale, with Flashpoint being an event I didn't know I would absolutely love as much as I did back in 2011 or so, and when Jonathan Hickman did, "Secret Wars," and its numerous tie-ins, that was pretty cool. I also plan to read a chunk of DC's current, "Future State," when some issues I ordered thanks to a good discount arrive.

Still, I saved money on both those events by getting the countless tie-in comics from dollar bins or reading trade paperback collections from the library. I wasn't in a rush to read these massive events that tweaked the World in cool ways but had way too many tie-in books. Other, recent events, I have basically avoided and just read the tie-in comics that I was already reading. I didn't follow, "Empyre," at all besides in the X-Men comics I was getting that touched-upon that event--to give one example.

"Heroes Reborn," could be a lot of fun, but I don't want to spend a bunch of money on it. I'll probably wait for the trade paperback/paperbacks collecting it to arrive at the library eventually. I'm in no rush to read the event and its increasing number of tie-ins, so I'll give it time. Saves me a chunk of change, after all.

Jeffrey Dean Morgan as a Thomas Wayne Batman Would've Been Cool

Way back in, "Batman VS Superman," we see Bruce Wayne's parents getting murdered in a flashback because it isn't a Batman movie without his parents getting shot. One thing about that though was a relatively popular actor, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, is Thomas Wayne. It was a tiny role, so why did they have him do it? Well, when a, "Flashpoint," movie was announced it all made sense. In the, "Flashpoint," comic we witness Barry Allen altering reality to make it so that his mother doesn't die during his childhood with his Father being wrongfully convicted as the killer. It causes a dramatic ripple through reality and changes a lot of things. One of those changes is that Bruce Wayne is shot that night in crime alley with Thomas Wayne becoming Batman and Martha going insane and becoming the Joker. This made me excited for a, "Flashpoint," movie with Jeffrey Dean Morgan as an older Batman and also excited my Mother-in-Law, Kim, for whom Jeffery Dean Morgan was one of her favorite actors. Then DC's movies became a mess.

Zack Snyder finished, "Batman VS Superman," but left or was fired from, "Justice League," depending on who you ask. Then DC scrapped their plans for a closely-linked film Universe and now is playing things more fast-and-loose in terms of continuity. They are still making a, "Flashpoint," movie but it'll have Ben Affleck still as Batman as he was in recent flicks plus Micheal Keaton of all people returning as Batman too. Ezra Miller will still be the Flash, but Jeffrey Dean Morgan won't be involved, it seems. That's a shame, as Jeffrey Dean Morgan as Batman would've been cool, as Zack Snyder and I agree--and I don't often agree with Snyder on stuff as he sometimes tries a little too hard to be edgy (like his recent bragging about how his director's cut of, "Justice League," will have Batman saying, "Fuck," on HBO MAX because that is...cool, I guess). I'm hopeful the, "Flashpoint," we do get is cool, but I'm just kind of bummed there will be a lack of Jeffrey Dean Morgan as Batman.

Film Friday: Ben Affleck Actually Back as Batman? What a World We Live In

Ben Affleck was done as Batman, he hated it....right? Well, in the upcoming, "Flash," movie that apparently will riff on the event, "Flashpoint," Ben Affleck will be one of the Batmen back for the role (Michael Keaton is confirmed and who knows if anyone else will pop-up). "Flashpointt," was all about time-travel and multi-dimensional shenanigans so this is a way for Warner Brothers/DC to basically say all their movies are, "True," in some manner. From the Zack Snyder stuff to, "Joker," to the upcoming Robert Pattinson Batman movie to the television shows which the movie-Flash, Ezra Miller--actually had a cameo in too.

It's a wild idea to just bring everything and the kitchen sink together, but DC seems to be considering this idea as opposed to trying to have a tightly-knit cinematic Universe as Marvel does. They were able to convince Ben Affleck to come back, so clearly he agrees with the idea to some degree. I look forward to seeing more as this all develops.

"Convergence" is a Fascinating Mess

Very Odd. Very, Very Odd

I read the DC event, "Convergence," in a big ol' hardcover thanks to my local library. Perhaps if I read some of the tie-ins things will make a bit more sense, but as far as I can tell, "Convergence," is just one big mess, yet a fascinating one too. Basically an excuse for fans to get to see characters they liked from various eras or alternate worlds, it sounds like something pretty straightforward, so of course DC has to go and muck it up.

This comic-event of course occurred to fill the gap for when DC moved their offices and at first looked like it would be a fun little thing for the fans but then it was decided it had to be some kind of mega-event and got hella bloated. We've got characters from the, "Earth 2," comics that apparently petered out before tying into this, there's the Nu52 folk, individuals from Zero Hour, Flashpoint, the DC stuff that existed after the first crisis up until the Nu52, and for good measure hints of other realities and comics too.

The plot of this comic involves a planet that is a desert full of little bottled cities being forced to fight each other, but that plot kind of goes away and turns into an epic battle against a villain named Telos...who then becomes good and helps everyone fight Brainiac, before everyone gets to go home and the world is wiped out...or something. But wait, it's okay because the planet turns into a new home for the, "Earth 2," folk and everyone is happy! Okay, everyone but the readers who are left scratching their head trying to figure out what the dickens just happened with all these shifting alliances, unmentioned realities suddenly popping-up, and general chaos.

Still, there is something almost Zen about a plot that takes six paragraphs to even summarize on Wikipedia and still makes little-to-no sense. A reader doesn't have to worry about why the things that occur are happening, they just kind of do and that's that. DC needed to kill some time so they threw all their toys in a fictional sandbox (literally, it is a desert world) and tried to come-up with some excuse for everyone to occupy the same page. In terms of actually being an interesting or coherent story, it is well below average, something like...
2 out of 5 stars.

However, when it comes to being passable entertainment that one can at least admire for its tenacity and commitment to being batshit crazy and insiting it makes sense when it doesn't, well, that makes this the kind of comic I feel I can give...
3 out of 5 stars.

So, check out, "Convergence," not if you want something well-crafted or clever, but if you get a kick out of alternate-reality comics and seeing a mish-mash of ideas splattered on the page with little regard for logic. I mean, at least after this DC has settled down and won't be doing anything else dramatic for...wait, what's this about a, "Rebirth?" Oh motherfu...

Done With Comic-Book Mega-Events AKA Eventitis Finally Takes Its Toll

D-O-N-E

Okay, that's it, I am officially tired of, exhausted by, and done with comic-book mega-events. I'm sorry big comic companies--specifically Marvel and DC--but I just don't have the patience, funds, or optimism to continue following these big event-comics you like to have. When it was one a year I could maybe manage, and sometimes they were even pretty good. I enjoyed "Civil War", "Final Crisis", "World War Hulk", and "Flashpoint" was surprisingly good too. Oh, and I actually kind of liked "Age of Ultron" and  "Infinity" even if they weren't many peoples' favorites.

The thing is though, over time the near-constant influx of events has just taken its toll on me. "Secret Invasion" started promisingly but ended up being startlingly mediocre. "Dark Reign" wasn't necessarily an event, but the "Siege" it led to was, and God was that terrible. I couldn't even finish "Fear Itself" and "Avengers Versus X-Men" may have put Cyclops in an interesting place thematically but was overall a pretty damn poor excuse for a 12-issue series. "52" was incredible, but "Countdown to Final Crisis" was an abomination, with "Blackest Night" being decent but nothing to get overly excited about (I have the same feelings about its follow-up "Brightest Day" but did like that a bit more). Then "Trinity War" turned out to be nothing more than a prelude to "Forever Evil" and with it almost finished I'm pretty sure that event is going to get a solid "C" or "C-" from me once it ends.

I couldn't even finish this event.

Now we have events that overlap with and tie-in to other events. DC is going to have their three weekly-comics going at once that all seem to end in March of 2015 (with the special month-long event in September that uses the horribly stupid 3-D cover gimmick again and which ties in to one of the weekly comics, "Future's End") and therefore might be leading up to another mega-event.
Marvel is going to be making a big deal out of killing Wolverine, and "Original Sin" just kicked off with tie-in mini-series in the works along with those dreaded ".1, .2, .3, etc." issues.Oh, and then Marvel announces a mini-event set in 2061 (100 years after Marvel officially "started" as it were), and starts teasing something called "Axis"  that will clearly involve the Avengers and the X-Men butting heads once again. Plus, there is something in the works featuring all the spider-men in the multi-verse teaming-up, and I'm officially just done, D-O-N-E, done.

Between DC's three weekly series and September event plus Marvel's mega and mini-events, I'm just through. I'm tired of having these huge world-spanning, "Things will never  be the same...until the next big event" shenanigans taking place on what feels like a near monthly-cycle of one event ending and another starting. I've officially caught the dreaded eventitis

What is "Eventitis"?

Some of you out there may not be familiar with the medical condition known as eventitis. The prefix "Event" is of course in reference to comic-book mega-events, and "itis" is a Latin and Greek suffix for something to become inflamed, abnormal, or in excess. Comic-books have and seem to be having more-and-more events and therefore, eventitis is basically a slang term for being burnt-out on all these comics events--with it I suppose quite literally meaning that there is an inflammation/overabundance of events causing irritation, specifically to a person's pocket-book.

Eventitis is usually something that does not happen overnight. Like most irritations and inflammations it develops slowly over time, bugging you slightly but being something you think will go away. Then one day you wake up, look at the problem, and wonder how you let it get so bad before doing anything about it--with the problem in this case of course being all the comic-events happening one after another, after another, after another. Eventitis is something that once contracted may eventually go away, or be stuck with a person forever. I don't know if my eventitis will somehow fade if the prefect event for me to is announced, or if I'm forever stuck with it. All I know is I've come down with it, and I've got it pretty badly.

Treatment

"D.A.R.E." may have failed as a program,
 but their slogan is quite apt in this case.

I've got eventitis, that much is clear. the only treatment I can think of for it is to not read all the events coming out, and that is in fact my plan.

I'm going to read the "zero" issue of "Original Sin" that was recently released out of curiosity but am not going to be following the event. I'm also not going to pick up any of the weekly comics DC is putting out, and September may be a month where I skip the relatively few DC books I'm still reading ("Batman" "Green Arrow", a "Justice League" or two and "Injustice: Year Two", which isn't even in the main DC Universe, possibly explaining why it is arguably the best book out of all of those). I'm not going to read that Spider-Man event, the Marvel 2061 stuff lacks a place on my pull-list, Wolverine can die without my reading about it, and whatever "Axis" is can carry on without me.

Nope. I'm not gonna do it.
I'm not going to get excited for this.

I still enjoy a variety of comics that are more popular and less popular along with being mainstream or independent. The new "Moon Knight" and "Loki: Agent of Asgard" comics from Marvel are killing it with barely any issues even out yet, and other Marvel titles that aren't trying to tie-in with major events are pretty great too. Image of course has stuff like "Saga" and "Zero" to keep my attention, and Avatar's "Uber" continues to be a treat. Plus there is "Afterlife with Archie" which is just great, and, "The Beautiful War" will be coming out relatively soon with great art by Ashley Wood, ensuring it will at least be gorgeous. All of these show that clearly I'm not burnt-out on comics as a thing I enjoy, I just have a severe case of eventitis.

I may have eventitis and not plan to actively buy and read all of these new events, but I will of course follow the news about them and potentially flip-through any issues I hear about with shocking matters. My main worry is just that some of the comics I still enjoy will tie-in with these events I'm not following and leave me extremely lost. At that point I may have to either resign myself to some confusion or just drop those comics tying-in with events if needed. When that potential time comes and irritates my eventitis I'll deal with it, but until then I guess I just have to accept the fact I have this condition and still enjoy the comics that don't bother it. Whatever the case, please do tell me how they kill off Wolverine; I'm betting its vague enough they can bring him back just a few months later.

Revisiting Past Posts Where I Was Wrong

There will be times I make a post and predict something will be awesome or terrible.Also, there may be times I make a prediction about some topic or the other. That's all well and good, but as I human and can mess up, sometimes I might be wrong. Seeing as how I've been at this blogging business for awhile now I thought it might be fun to revisit some of my "Greatest Misses" as it were...

Things I Got Wrong

"The Twelve" Should Have Remained Unfinished
For my 2nd post I ever did, I asked about whatever happened to the comic, "The Twelve", as at the time it had been suffering a lengthy delay since the eighth issue. I was eager to see this promising comic come to a conclusion, but once it finally did finish I learned that whatever I had pictured in my head for an ending to the series was much better than what actually occurred. Namely, we got an android who was murdering people because he had no genitals...or something. I should have known better than to expect a good ending to a story by ol' Joe Straczynski, as pretty much any comic he's done lately either ends with him concluding it horribly, or basically just leaving the tale hanging in the air for someone else to come in and clean up. At least artist Chris Weston stayed solid throughout, which made things bearable.

Solo-Podcasting Is a Lonely Act
Earlier on in my blog I tried to do some podcast episodes. I got up to about 10 I think before I noticed basically nobody was listening--probably because one man babbling on about the "Captain America" movie for almost an hour isn't as interesting as I thought it would be. I suppose the issue is that when I am writing I have time to go back and edit my words to make them the most interesting/insightful/funny/non-crazy I can...and with my podcasts I couldn't. Now I know I could have done more editing, but when I was first doing a podcast I didn't know much at all about sound-editing so it was frankly a mess. Oh well, at least when I did some podcast bits for another website where I contributed for some time I was better.

"Fear Itself" was Awful, and "Flashpoint" was Good
For most of my posts before "Fear Itself" and "Flashpoint" started I had already basically decided that I was going to like Marvel's event-comic more than DC's one. Maybe it was because I thought the whole idea of making an alternate-universe trip an event was lame, or became even more cynical when it was revealed how "Flashpoint" was leading into a big re-launch. Whatever the case, I thought "Fear Itself" was going to be the bee's knees and "Flashpoint" would be trash.

Well, as early as the first issue "Flashpoint" was impressive (much to my then-surprise), and "Fear Itself" turned out to be so terrible I eventually just gave up reading it and looked up important plot-points I needed to know online. Meanwhile "Flashpoint" and some of its tie-ins delivered a quality tale, even with it basically just serving as an excuse to reboot the DC Universe. I definitely called which event comic would be better incorrectly.

A Comic About the Suicide Girls Turned Out to Be Really Good
I had made a prediction that a comic using the concept of the adult modeling site, "Suicide Girls" would be awful. I mean, the comic had a silly sounding science-fiction plot and it wasn't even an adult comic (which would have made sense) it was just a cheesecakey mature-readers comic that seemed like little more than a cash-grab. Well, after a bunch of various people told me I needed to read it, I finally did, and then I ate crow when I admitted it was actually a pretty good comic.

Rob Liefeld is Apparently Actually a Jerk
I had made a post discussing comic-book folk whose work I didn't like but I heard were nice, and people whose work was good but apparently were unpleasant people. I listed Liefeld as a nice guy, but then not too long after he began a very public display of being a huge jackass. So much for my thinking he was at least pleasant. Do please note that should Rob Liefeld want to prove me double-wrong he is welcome to reach out to me and insist he is not a jerk--as long as he contacts me in a non-jerky way; please throw no bricks through my window.

Vertigo is Doing Okay After All
Pretty recently the mature-reader's imprint of DC known as "Vertigo" looked like it might be in trouble. While DC in general may still be quite a mess of editorial shake-ups and changes, the going-ons at Vertigo seem to have stabilized pretty well. The Scott Snyder-written, "The Wake" was a certifiable hit, and other quality books coming out such as "Trillium"and "Federal Bureau of Physics" are garnering good press and unquestionably decent sales. The new "Astro City" ongoing that launched through Vertigo is doing well (it used to be a Wildstorm-imprint comic, but yeah), and of course Neil Gaiman's "Sandman: Overture" which serves as a prequel to his beloved "Sandman" series is doing gangbusters.

While I and others across the web were about ready to declare Vertigo no more, it recovered from some shaky times and looks like it might be able to carry on alright for some more time still. As long as the imprint can still put out some quality books (and has "Sandman: Overture" to pump it full of revenue) I think Vertigo will be alright.

Nobody's Perfect
I can't always be right, and even when I've thought I was incorrect sometimes it was more a matter of my opinion being changed (Some people might have hated the "Suicide Girls" comic even after reading it, for instance). In the end, whether I'm right wrong, and you agree or disagree with my thoughts, I think the most important thing is we learned a valuable lesson. What that lesson is however, I have no clue.

Film Friday: A Random Bunch of Rented Movies

Opening Credits
I've watched a number of movies lately, be they rentals over the internet, acquired at a Redbox kiosk, or found via the magic of Netflix. I thought it would be fun to review them in no particular order as while I haven't been to a movie theater for a bit, I have seen plenty of flicks sitting on the couch. Without further ado, I present to you a bunch of random movies!

Olympus Has Fallen

There are action movies you have to switch off your brain to enjoy, and then there are the kind of films that basically require you to be utterly brain-dead when it comes to any form of logic. Should you be able to completely and without question accept this film's way of showing things, with a single plane somehow getting past our air security, assaulting the white house, and then a weird kind of ground-invasion taking place with the result of course being where only ONE MAN can save the President...then yeah, this is kind of fun.

The cast is pretty good too. Gerard Butler has his ruggedly good looks, Aaron Eckert plays the Prez decently, and Morgan Freeman seems criminally under-utilized, but let's be honest, you aren't seeing this movie for the acting--you're seeing this because you want to watch shit blow up even if its the White House, but that's okay because in the end America comes out on top and boy aren't we awesome, USA, USA, USA!

Yeah, I play an evil jerk in this movie, it's a living.

Oh, I almost to forgot to mention how I knew from the first moment I saw him that Dylan McDermott was going to be a bad guy, because lately when it seems you need someone to be the villain, he's the go-to guy (see the TV show "Hostages" for proof). Obvious villain and lack of any common-sense aside, I kind of enjoyed this in a guilty-pleasure sort of way.
3 out of 5 stars.

The Lords of Salem

Rob Zombie made the mostly-mediocre movie, "House of a 1000 Corpses" that had some flashes of genius but generally was a bit of a slog. He also made the quite impressively good, "The Devil's Rejects" which despite some issues (many aspects are heavily cribbed from other movies, such as the insane sheriff bringing back memories of "Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2") is definitely a flick I would say is solid horror-viewing. I skipped Zombie's "Halloween" remakes because I'd rather just watch the originals than a remake, but I was excited for "The Lords of Salem" in the hopes I would get more of that "Devil's Rejects" magic. I didn't.

You can imagine how disappointed I was when instead of the often clever dialogue in "Devil's Rejects" I received over-the-top melodrama. Instead of the creative imagery of "Devil's Rejects" flick I got a random confusing mess of pictures. Plus the plot was basically garbage, and all-in-all I was extremely let down. There are at least a few tense moments, but mostly I would say this is a waste of time.
1 out of 5 stars.

Dredd

This movie does pretty good justice (get it?) to the famous comic-character. Its futuristic but feels grounded, gritty and violent, but with some moments of levity to help relieve tension. The basic plot is that Dredd and a rookie cop/"Judge" become trapped in a 200-story apartment complex and have to fight their way out. Yes, this plot is a bit like, "The Raid: Redemption" and folk have actually accused each movie of ripping the other off at various points in time. Both are fine movies however so why bother comparing them when instead you can just enjoy the snazzy slo-mo gunfights in "Dredd" and kung-fu in "The Raid"? If you enjoy action movies, do give "Dredd" a try.
3.5 out of 5 stars.

Pain & Gain

Michael Bay is a director known for various quirks. He likes to do quick-cuts, his movies go on a bit too long, and there has never been an over-the-top action sequence he would hesitate to throw in. Pain & Gain is actually pretty enjoyable however because Bay seems to tone down things and instead focus on a more human tale, that is all the more interesting due to how much of it comes from a an absurdly true story during which body-builders formed a gang and committed increasingly heinous crimes.

Bay does a solid job of making our protagonists sympathetic enough that we still like them  even as their actions get increasingly violent and unforgivable until things get to a point where you have to ask, "Really? They were this sociopathic and stupid?" and then find out that yes, they were. "Pain & Gain" is a movie that runs too long, is full of jokes that seem to miss a bit more than they hit, but is made well enough that you feel like you at least had some fun when its over.
3 out of 5 stars.

InAPPropriate Comedy

Well, this was terrible. Even though almost everyone hated another comedy-sketch movie that came out recently, "Movie 43," I thought it at least had its moments of being at least kind of funny. This film however, often just takes a punch-line that is barely humorous as it is and then milks it until the metaphorical cow has long since gone dry. A spoof of Jackass with an all-black cast called, "Blackass"? Okay, but then you do "skits" with that idea it loses any humor beyond relying on racial jokes. Speaking of racial jokes, "The Amazing Racist" with a guy going around being a huge racist again elicits a small chuckle at first, and then keeps going and going, and going until you just want each bit to end.

Oh, you think Asians can't drive? Okay.
You're going to do this joke for 10 or so minutes? No thanks.

As for other segments, Adrien Brody--who actually has a Best Actor award from the Oscars, keep that in mind--appears in some barely funny shorts where he plays a gay version of Dirty Harry known as, "Flirty Harry," and that too wears out its welcome when it becomes apparent we're getting little more than barely-disguised puns as our jokes. The less said about Rob Schneider and Michelle Rodriguez as porn-critics the better for that DOA bit, and Lindsay Lohan's brief appearance in the movie wasn't entertaining so much as it made me marvel at how bad she looks these days--the years of drug and alcohol use definitely have taken their toll.

There are some ever-so-brief glimpses of actual humor, such as bit where Schneider serves as a Psychiatrist to a former sex and drug-addict and he seems more interested in the sex and drugs than helping her, and the riff on "127 hours" at the beginning made me smile, but those are tiny nuggets of joy in a steaming pile of misery.  Unless you want to not laugh for 80-ish minutes (which felt like forever) you should avoid this film at all costs.
0.5 out of 5 stars.

This is the End

I thought this would be funnier, considering the cast. It was pretty below-average though. That's pretty much all I have to say about that.
2 out of 5 stars.

Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox

I actually found the comic-event, "Flashpoint" to be a lot of fun even if in the end it was used more as an excuse for DC to reboot their Universe into the "Nu52" than it was an exercise in creating a solid story. That said, this movie actually might be better than the comic because it doesn't have all the tie-ins weighing it down, and instead the key points and characters can be focused on.

The animation is solid, and even though I've never been a huge fan of any version of the Flash (well, I did have a slight soft-spot for Wally West), I found Barry Allen engaging enough that I wanted things to work out well for him, plus the Batman of this altered-world is just as interesting in the movie as he is in the comics. This is definitely worth checking out.
4 out of 5 stars.

Ending Credits
I've seen some movies I liked, and others I loathed, but to truly appreciate films I guess you need to see both the good and the bad.

The Flashpoint Hardcover, A Movie About Damn Dirty Apes, And "Our Love Is Real"

A New Morning
Flashpoint had its hardcover come out a bit ago, I read that and thought I would offer some opinions. I also viewed, "Rise of The Planet Of The Apes," and found it quite solid. I also wanted to discuss an odd little sci-fi comic I read titled, "Our Love Is Real."

Countless Tie-Ins Aside, Was The Main Story Good?--Flashpoint Hardcover

Seriously, this comic had a lot of tie-ins. For those out of the know, "Flashpoint," had this plot where Barry Allen, The Flash, wakes up from a nap and the whole Universe has changed with only our titular hero being aware everything has gone horribly wrong. The main comic told his story while the many, many tie-in comics fleshed out the Universe. I didn't bother with almost any of the tie-in comics and it seems I didn't miss much as only the Batman one was truly awesome, and the Outsider one was worth a gander.

We essentially have a tale of another universe as Barry Allen and Batman (who Batman is in this Universe is a pretty nifty twist) try to go about fixing things--and what a messed up universe it is. Aquaman and Wonder Woman are villains at war with one another, there never was a Superman, and Frankenstein's monster fought in World War II. Okay, that last one is actually pretty cool and good thing, but you see where I'm going with this.

The question is if this comic is in fact worth reading if you don't know much about DC continuity or didn't bother to pick up all those other stories that relate to this. I would say, yeah, this is a pretty good yarn. Writer Geoff Johns can tell a fun tale without too much blood and guts or death (See: Blackest Night for something with those features) when he wants to, and this is pretty entertaining. From the none-too-shocking twists that occur off-and-on to the nice artwork, and heartwarming quiet scenes to go with the crazy action-packed ones, this is a generally good time.

True, you could get all the other issues/upcoming trades to fill-out the whole story, but you don't really need to (although as I said, that Batman one is pretty killer). Not knowing much about DC continuity didn't hurt me too much even though I wasn't sure who some of the people were and why it was surprising they were suddenly heroes or villains in this Universe, but I still enjoyed myself.
3.5 out of 5 stars.

Moral Of The Story? Don't Make The Chimp Angry--Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes

This was better than I expected, and I expected it to be decent but not too good. As you by now are probably aware, this is a prequel to the Planet of The Apes movies (and I would hope you know by now that the main twist of the old Planet of The Apes movie was that it was Earth all along--get it?). As you also are probably aware this did well in theaters and has a sequel in the works and got pretty good reviews. What did I think? As I said, I was impressed. Yes, it spent a little too much time showing our hero-chimp named Cesar gathering his army of apes, and perhaps the love-interest James Franco develops seems to serve little-to-no point other than giving him someone else to give exposition to, but those are minor flaws compared to what the movie gets right.

What does the movie get right? Well, it pays homage to the whole idea of the astronauts who got lost (the very ones who come to Earth in the future movies, clever), the special effects are amazing, the movie subtly sets up how the humans could end up being a minority to apes without hitting us over the head with that plot point leaving it as something for sequels, and boy are those action scenes of the apes causing mayhem in the city and at the Golden Gate Bridge spectacular.

This was an entertaining movie. It had a bit of a morality lesson about how we treat animals but wasn't too preachy, it had action, moments of reflection, and of course apes rising (so it delivers on what the movie title promises). I'd recommend seeing it regardless of if you've seen the old Planet of The Apes movies, and even if that one recent remake of the movies left a horrible taste in your mouth and has you fearful of this. Don't worry, this is actually good.
4 out of 5 stars.

Now For Something Completely Different--Our Love Is Real

I have read a really weird comic. It's about a world where there are people who have relationships with minerals--like stones and gems--through auras, people who are into vegetables, and zoosexuals, like our protagonist who has a dog at home he counts as his lover. In this world none of this is kept secret but is instead out in the open and accepted (except for vegisexuals who are protesting for their rights, it would seem), and basically there are of course some plot developments that make us the reader question what love is and such. For a comic about such a controversial idea it is never really that gross or sexual, but even the idea of these sort of sexual acts is probably enough to make some people really upset by the existence of this comic.

It was self-published but sold like gangbusters multiple times until Image comics picked it up and helped publish it. It's an interesting read and the art is good, plus as I said it isn't especially dirty, just odd. Still, I found the way a romance in the story developed to be a bit too forced--which I guess is understandable as you only have so many pages--but I can't excuse the weak ending. At least I found it pretty weak. Still, it was an intriguing comic with a unique and very strange idea that worked pretty well until the subpar close, so I suppose I could say I enjoyed it a pretty good amount. I picked up the first and second issue of a new mini-series by the writer, Sam Humphries, so I wonder what it will hold.
3 out of 5 stars.

An Old Evening
That's the day's business, as they apparently say--and if they don't say it, so what? You have no proof otherwise. In all seriousness, "Flashpoint," was a pretty good read, "Rise of The Planet Of The Apes," was quite enjoyable, and, "Our Love Is Real," just has a certain strange charm about it.

"It's About Power and Money" AKA Nu DCU, Soldier X, and Tupac

Opening
This post we have my thoughts about how the "old" DC Universe ended in Flashpoint #5 along with how it began in Justice League #1. Then I say my own thoughts about the highly-popular Cable and Soldier X comics that occurred back in the early 2000s, having been inspired by series of cross-over posts between some writers I really enjoy reading.

Also, tomorrow is the 15th anniversary of the death of one of my favorite music artists, Tupac Shakur. I'll discuss my two favorite albums by him a little bit and why his death matters even if you don't like rap.

Yeah, it's a lot of content to share, but with my new format of only posting every 2, 3, or 4 days I'm hoping you dear readers will drink down every word I type now like a rare can of Surge soda. Remember Surge? That stuff was tasty, and had more caffeine than humanly possible. Yeah, I could go for a Surge if all those cans wouldn't be super-expired.

Flashpoint and Justice League

Flashpoint #5 was a decent comic, even if it pretty much consisted of Barry Allen either standing around doing nothing so Thomas Wayne could (spoiler) kill the Reverse-Flash, or Barry Allen going back in time and undoing all the trouble he caused because--TWIST!--it seems he is the one who caused this alternate reality by making it so his mom didn't die or something. Oh, and in the process these different realities come together and this mysterious woman who is appearing in all the other DC comics in a cameo (probably as a way for DC to have an emergency undo-the-recon-button) spouts some enigmatic gibberish. Then Barry Allen gives Bruce Wayne a letter from his father and Bruce cries because its sweet--of course, it technically isn't our Bruce Wayne as this is the new DC Universe, but whatever. I liked Thomas Wayne and the action was good, so I'm satisfied.

3 out of 5 stars.

Justice League #1 is a fun Batman and Green Lantern team-up comic set in the beginning of the new DC Universe, but it isn't really a first issue of a Justice League book. At least, it doesn't feel that way. It feels like the first part of something that was written for a trade paperback and then suddenly split into a comic-book issue format--the cliffhanger is just sort of weak (Hm, Superman, a fight next issue, eh) and things seem to move sooooooo slowly. Oh, we also meet Cyborg before he becomes a Cyborg and is just really good at football. I don't know, Geoff Johns wrote both this and the Flashpoint books, and Flashpoint #1 jammed in a ton of content, whereas this just seems really decompressed--if I may use a term comic fans often employ. At least the Jim Lee art looks decent.
2.5 out of 5 stars.

Cable and Solider X

INTRO
The Hooded Utilitarian and The Factual Opinion did a series of reviews about the comic book/s Cable and its follow-up Soldier X. There was the first installment, the second, a first part to the third, a 2nd part to the third, and a fourth and final post. I've read the books because I was inspired to pick them up after initially reading this excellent article on Robot 6 long ago.

When I picked up the Cable comics the funny thing is I had to get some before its dramatic shift in focus with issue #97 that lasted to #107 (and made for some awesome comics), and boy, was it a terrible comic. Issue #96 is this lame one-off about Cable helping this ancient huge-man fight these other huge ancient huge-guys because the first one wants a doll he gave to his deceased daughter they stole. Oh, and this ancient huge-guy who has lived so long knows Cable is special because Cable beats him at arm-wrestling and no one can do that. Seriously.

The arc before that is some miserable stuff about Jean Grey having genetic Phoenix sisters or something that no other comic has ever acknowledged so just forget it and a reporter named Irene (who is in Soldier X) has to have her skin color changed from white to black so that she can avoid being killed by this evil cult and learns that racism still exists when a police officer picks on her--so we learn from the comic that racism is bad in this really ham-fisted way! Wow, how touching!

 If you're going to try and talk about racism, please don't just do lame, "Hey, you know racism, yeah, it still exists, shocking, huh?" type stories with someone who was white magically becoming black and learning a valuable lesson--that is just the most cliche, "look at me, I'm a message" type story. Anyways, yeah, they were bad. However, then something awesome happens, namely issue #97 and on.

CABLE #97-107
This here is some good stuff. Basically, writer David Tischman and excellent artist Igor Kordey came in and made this comic go from horrendous to awesome in the span of one issue. Tischman took the idea that Cable is from the future, and has knowledge of how little conflicts in history could grow and become huge problems that lead to the nightmare scenario that mutants face in the future--so why wouldn't he get involved and try to fix things now? This led to Cable going into hotspots around the world and considering that Igor Kordey is himself a vetran of Balkan wars and this comic involves post-soviet areas you know this isn't too fantastical. Also, this comic was happening right around 9/11 and didn't hesitate to address it. Right on the opening of one issue is a drawing of the towers, on fire, broadcast on a television. This comic was about Cable addressing terror around the world, so it noted the fact that yes, terrorism had happened close to home too. It was a serious, clever, and beautiful-looking comic. You can actually get it collected in two trades, "Shining Path" and "The End", and I would recommend doing as such.

SOLDIER X #1-8
There were issues after #8, but screw them because they had writers who missed the point of the awesomeness that was Soldier X. Soldier X was half the time a parody of super-hero comics, at other times it  was about the God-complex we have in regards to super-hero characters, thinking of them as if they are religious figures, and then other times it was just about the futility of violence...in a comic about a character whose main modus operandi was violence--thereby making his own existence pointless. Then again, Cable being pointless was sort of what writer Darko Macan was going for in his darkly funny comic, almost mocking the idea of Cable while at the same time elevating him to a God-like level of power, but with the knowledge that using this power to wreak havoc just proves nothing. Igor Kordey continued to provide great art and its some super stuff. I'm sort of unique in actually maybe liking the Cable stuff a little bit more though--don't skip this Soldier X material however, it's dynamite too.

Tupac--15 Years After Death

Tomorrow, September 13th, will be the 15th anniversary of the death of Tupac Shakur (June 16th, 1971-September 13th, 1996). Tupac was arguably one of the most talented music artists I've ever heard. When it comes to listing the most gifted talents in music ever some names I give in no particular order would be Mozart, Kurt Cobain, Beethoven, Bach, Andre Benjamin AKA Andre 3000 of OutKast, Miles Davis, Coltrane, and of course Tupac (there are other people I'm not listing, but you get my point for whom I think of as "cream of the crop).

Just listen to "The 7 Day Theory" AKA "Makaveli". David Brother's writes his thoughts about it beautifully on the 4thletter; it truly is an album so loaded with textual meaning you could work on "decoding" it forever. I also am a huge fan of "Me Against The World" easily saying those are my two favorite albums by Mr. Shakur. Just listen to "Death Around the Corner" and tell me the paranoia and despair doesn't seem to just hang in the air around you as the song plays--or as a complete counter, try "Dear Mama" and see just how gentle and sweet Tupac could be. In contrast, to go back to his last album he was directly involved in before his death and the first to be released posthumously, "Makaveli" has some incredibly incendiary tracks. "Bomb First (My Second Reply)" is pure fire.

There are also some love songs. "Just Like Daddy" is both sweet and dark, talking about love and how it's pretty much about young women with daddy issues. There is also, "Me and My Girlfriend," which for those of you who are a bit slow with metaphors, is in fact about guns. Listen closely and you'll catch on. Yeah, the Jay-Z and Beyonce version completely ruined it and missed the point, but never-mind that. Don't forget the inspirational songs like, "Hold Ya Head" which even in trying to be supportive carries an air of depression--something you find often with Tupac. My point is that the man was a lyrical genius, and no slouch when it came to contributing to the production of the tracks either.

By the way, my favorite Tupac song is a tie between "Lord Knows" and "Outlaw" on "Me Against The World". A close second are both "Life Of A New Outlaw" and "Bomb First (My Second Reply)" on "The 7 Day Theory"/"Makaveli".

There is plenty more I could say about Tupac, but I just wanted to say, this was a man who had incredible lyrics that spoke so much truth, and carried so much sadness, but with a glimmer of hope--but always with that darkness. The best way to sum it up is how on, "Just Like Daddy," it is being said by a member of the Outlawz (E.D.I.) that a young woman a he met was, "A diamond in the rough, the kind that you can love, not yet touched but so much..." and at that moment we hear Tupac quietly come in saying, "Pain" before E.D.I. states, "Potential." That bit says so much, that its the pain that Tupac jumps to. There was so much sadness, but that slight tiny bit of hope he had was what made things all the more beautiful.

Then he was murdered. We still don't know for sure who did it. It happened 15 years ago tomorrow. Life is a real bitch sometimes.

Sorry to end on a downer, but sometimes that's how things are.